Evaluating your Marriage.

For better or worse,

Marriage, it's a journey. I know when I got married I set expectations for my life. I'm a person who loves to be in control of the outcome. I like to know whats gonna happen. I make a plan and I follow it. I'm a realist, a logical thinker &&& one hell of a dreamer. 

I pictured this life full of happiness, love, white picket fence type picture.
I expected date nights and spending weekends on adventures. Creating our own little family, on our time, sweet babies & Pinterest worthy house. I was going to teach my kids all the things, do all the crafts. You get it. I thought it would all be perfect.

Then life happens.
You go through the honeymoon phase but at some point work, busy, bills take priority. 

Then you have kids. && they need all your attention. Holding them, snuggling them, getting up 500 times every night. OHHH and the extra bills from having kids. More mouths to feed, meaning working more to cover the costs.

You turn around and 2 years later you realize you hardly see your spouse. Let alone have an actual conversation, and don't even ask the last time you had alone time. Or even a half assed date. 

You have kind of lost who you are as a couple and especially who you are as a person. 

The last couple years I've dove deeper into growth. I've learned if you're not obsessed with the way your life is, well then YOU get to change it. & that goes for all aspects of your life.
Marriage, parenting, time spent, finances, your job.
If you don't like it, do something about it!

So let me ask, 

What does that dream marriage look like to you?
How is your time spent together?

Do you have weekly dates?

How often are you intimate? ohhh yeah, i'm going there. 

Remember don't compare to other peoples lives. Look at that future life you want to create. What would make YOU happy?

So I asked myself these questions and dove into taking action to creating the marriage I want. Now let me be clear. You can love your spouse, your kids, your life and still not be in love with the circumstances or the day to day reality. Just because you want to work at creating better doesn't mean you aren't grateful for what you have. In life you're either growing or dying and I want my marriage to FLOURISH. I want to love my husband more today than I ever have and know that tomorrow Ill love him even more. 

&&& ya'll that's not the easiest. It takes intentional time. Lots of effort. Tons of grace. In a marriage you see the good, the bad and the ugly. Navigating the good and bad days. The moods of each other, the chaos in work and family life.
The work you do today in your marriage waters it for tomorrow. Do the hard. Choose love everyday. 

When was the last time you've asked yourself, "how can I show up to be a better spouse today?"